The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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