We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize