Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
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