let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
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