I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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