A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Randomize
