Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
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