we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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