He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize