Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Randomize
