just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Randomize
