Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
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