I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize
