The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize
