you mean i was at the winter classic?
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
So I just went to clothing optional bar
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