no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
