so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Randomize
