I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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