You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize