he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
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