sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Randomize
