I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
