I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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