You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
