I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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