She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
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