New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
