we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
