I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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