Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
