Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize