the new term for farting is butt boxing.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
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