fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Randomize
