Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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