Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Randomize
