on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Randomize
