Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
