I hope mine doesn't look like that
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
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