pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Randomize