We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
This house was built for laser tag.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Randomize
