I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
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