Im at strip club and am horny
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
i dont even know how to be here
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Randomize