there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
