If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
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