Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Randomize
