Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
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do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
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Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
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