this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
