Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
