so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
