I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize