What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
There r osticjed everywhere
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Randomize
